Bacaw!
September 28, 2005Onemana, New Zealand
3:29pm
First off. Congratulations to one of my best friends and my best man and his wife on the birth of their baby girl today. Or yesterday really. The same birthday as her mother. Very cool. Chicken Jimmy has his own little hen to raise. How cool is that.
Now that she has finally has arrived and my other best friend Cobes is married, can all the focus be returned to me? I mean I am the one who quit a job I loved, sold a house way under value, and came to a country that everyone says is really really ugly. Focus please people. Spotlight back on Jason.
But seriously folks, shout out to the chicken, who as a provincially recognized breast stroke champion, finally proved that his boys could swim as well. I love you brother. And now Hud will have a choice between Davis and Charlotte to take to his high school formal. And then back to his hotel suite. Prrrowrrr.
Speaking of Hud, we had a good father son day on Sunday. I think I will take him every Sunday to give Steph time to knit and drink expensive coffee. Hud’s lime green sweater should be done just before we leave here. Or in a week. Steph takes to things pretty fast. She is as smart as she is pretty.
We kissed her cheek and drove to town to take back movies and library books. My pocket was full of the random change we put in a small bowl for Hud to have his own money to spend at Sunnys, New Zealand’s answer to a dollar store. They have a huge assortment of toys for $2. They are all Chinese made and have delightfully absurd translations on the box covers. In fact, here are the bullet points on Pirate regalia we bought today for Saturday’s celebration at the playground. (it’s a big ship).
• Classic Pirate appropriation equipments (what?)
• Shortcut in the ocean tool (huh?)
• The metals defends the true version (come again?)
And finally, in bold, after those three gems. Beautiful Music Function. Is that great? The package includes an eye patch, a small cutlass and a hoop earring. Of course it does.
So we dropped off the books and movies and went to Sunny’s where Hud bought a snake. Hud informed me quickly: It’s not a snake it’s a cobra! We settled on calling it a cobra snake.
We drove further along the town and tried a new beach access. It’s school holidays here in NZ, so more people are in town and more people are on the beach. Not in the water, its still too cold, but walking and wishing they could go in the water.
The NZ school year is split into four semesters. They get three two-week breaks and one six-week break (Mid December to end of January) in between the semesters. It seems like a lot, but it’s about the same as ours back home time wise.
Hud and I sat at the edge of the surf and played with the new cobra snake, or at least he did while I got suckered into watching the ocean. It’s like a campfire. You just get hypnotized by the never ending waves that break against the shore. I could watch it forever.
After about half an hour, Hud decided he had enough and announced we should go. So go we did because I am not just his father, I am a servant to his every whim and delight! Yes sir I said hopping to, and buckling him into his thrown, please do not strike me with cobra snake, your trusty head of security and merlinesque advisor.
Next stop, an estuary down the coast a little, for an orange chocolate chip ice cream cone and watch kids surf their kayaks into shore on mini waves. Holy neato did it look fun. Uh oh. Due to my five litres of water a day consumption, I have to pee oh, every 23 seconds. I had to use the washroom. Luckily there was a small beige building near the access path to the beach. We approached and I noticed a green light flashing above the vacancy sign. High tech I thought and we entered and the door slid shut.
“Attention, the door is closed, please press the button to lock the door” The toilet was bossing me around. I pressed the button.
“The door is now locked. In ten minutes the door will unlock” And then, I kid you not, Burt Bacharach’s classic, What the world needs now is love sweet love came on, serenading me as I held the one thing I love the most in this world, my penis.
Hud thought it was pretty cool too. A talking toilet he said to me with a huge smile. Yes my boy, a talking toilet, what an age we live in. And the ten minutes should be enough for anyone.
But it sure would be funny if after a night of cheese and bananas, you were sitting on the throne and that the mellifluous toilet voice announced the door would be opening in three two one…
The scramble to wipe is a very cartoon like image. Cartoon or George Costanza.
We drove home soon after. Steph still wasn’t home so Hud and I played a little more with cobra snake. He hissed at me. I hissed at him. I ruffled his hair. He ruffled my scalp. Steph came home. We kissed her on the cheek again hello.
The last couple of days have blurred into each other. I have written a lot of the novel and was going to have a record week but today was blown apart by my agreeing to go to town with Steph and Hud.
Yesterday I hung out with Hud and three other kids on our street. A 12, 7, and five year old. We ate Mandarin oranges given to us by the old guy from his trees. We rolled down the huge hill on our bikes. I pushed them all back up and almost passed out. We played with a superball. Steph made us pick up our peels and put them in the garbage.
Then the lights came on and I had to go home.
This trip was so worth it.
Love to all,
J
Oh and we are booked in NZ for February. The trip continues.
posted by Jason @ 9:49 PM
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